Sunday, November 14, 2010

Ridin' the Roller Coaster as a Family

Well.  I hardly know what to say anymore.  We had a horrendous day yesterday - just absolutely gritting my teeth to get through the day, hoping we didn't have to make another trip to the hospital, and we didn't.  But, my daughter was so agitated all day.  I spent the day putting out virtual fires.  Getting her brother to be quieter, managing the scents in our home, from the chicken I foolishly cooked, to the smoke from a neighbor's cigarette coming in through the window I had opened to vent the chicken smell . . . I didn't sit down until my girl was too tired to keep going, but too tired to sleep, and she was afraid of her invisible people, so I sat on her bed for about three hours until we gave up and climbed into my bed so we both could sleep.

My son was largely left to fend for himself, something he's not especially happy about.  So - I shuffled back and forth, keeping them as separate as I could to keep the peace.  When he gets fed up - and believe me, having a sister pick on absolutely everything you do, from breathing too loud to making too much sound pressing the buttons on the hand held game, all of the criticism and controlling behavior does wear on a guy - he makes whatever sound he can to bug her.  Setting off a firestorm.  He's not wrong.  And it's not her fault.  No one is right, no one is wrong, it's just impossible for me to effectively manage both of their needs by myself.

But I'm it.  So - we got through the day, and tried to get some sleep.  And then, somehow, and I have no idea how, today is better.  But I started out laying down the law first thing this morning.  We would all get some exercise.  We would all get out of the house, together, for an hour or two.  And we did.  It wasn't easy by any stretch of the imagination.  She was reluctant, and was adamant that there were places she couldn't go, couldn't stand.  He wanted no part of it.  But we found a compromise, at least she and I did, and I made little brother come along, completely against his will.  And then I made him have fun downtown. 

We walked, took photos of public art and random pigeons and ate baklava from the local maket.  We stumbled on an antiques street fair, looked at antiques from the 1960's and 1970's, hello old friends, and then we got takeout mexican food and drove home.  All in one piece, not much bickering.

What will our afternoon be like?  Or tomorrow?  I have not the foggiest idea.  But it won't be boring.


  1. OMF'nG The behavior your daughter demonstrates here is JUST like my dd's but hers is all about sound! Don't even get me started on the interactions between her brother... OY-VEY! Oh, and just to compound things he has bipolar too. No wonder my home is a circus!

    I AM glad that you had a wonderful moment or two with them that day. Those are the treasures we seek :) .

  2. I need a super energy pill to try to keep this going! Ah well, it'll just be more special as a once in a while deal.

    Hope you are able to make treatment progress in the new year, and that you get some of your own peaceful moments!